Old People
Questions and Answers from an AARP Forum
Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you are done you will have a place to live.
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.
Q: Why should 50+ year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.
Q: Is it common for 50+ year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 50+ year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Darn, I remember these."
-and-
My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died in December) and he brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a bunch of holes in it. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something. I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to 'sprinkle' clothes with because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I am old!
So there you have it. I hope you got a chuckle from these.
4 comments:
I enjoyed your jokes, and laughter is a good stress reducer.
These were funny but some of them are true for me! Crap, I'm old!
Great stuff!! I used those sprinkle bottles when I was a kid and helped my mom with the ironing. No steam iron, it was solid metal and weighed a ton!
Who's old? I'm old! Can I get a whoop-whoop?!
Hysterical! Oh so true!! :)
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